Physical Education

Being a very busy homeschooler, it can be hard to find chances to play sports. Which, even though I stink at every sport ever invented known to man, I love. So we were ecstatic when the homeschool group we're in started a PE about five years ago. When we first started, all we did was running, stretching, pull-ups, push-ups, and various other forms of torture, all in the name of fitness. Fortunately, the majority of attendees despised having a strict exercise regime (including Yours Truly)and eventually managed to reform the PE group into a PE group-with sports! And that is how I am now sitting here at the computer, excitedly waiting until we leave for PE. Four and a half hours! Four hours twenty-nine minutes! Four hours twenty-eight minutes! Those of you dear readers who have ever attended PE with me so far this year have probably, at one time or another, been on a volleyball team with me. And I do apologize for that. And you probably know that I have a tendency to get a little excited when the ball is remotely in my area. And you probably know that when I get excited, I have a tendency to make mistakes. So, when the volleyball is coming to me, or to the person in front of me in a manner that they are likely to miss and I shall have to attempt to save the ball, I will do one of  things.

• Freak out and say, "YOURS!" and then get upset if the other person misses. Sad but true.
• Say, "MINE!" at the same time as the other person, then we both try to hit the ball but miss.
• Leap for the ball, whack it into a tree.
• Whack the ball, but backwards.
• Return the ball. Work on returning it into this county next time.
• Stare at the ball coming towards me thinking, "bump, set, bump, set, bump, set, bump, set, bump, set, bump, set," unable to make up my mind which to do, and I end up catching it because my brain doesn't work fast enough.
• And occasionally, watch the ball, make up my mind whether to bump or set, do so, and return the ball perfectly. But this is very rare and you are unlikely to witness it.

The awesome thing about our PE group is that, to an extent, we're all friends. Not in a creepy way. You see, you don't have to worry about looking like a moron when you're there. Everybody accepts you how you are and loves you for it. Usually. So even if you're the guy who feels defective anywhere else because he can't throw a two-thousand yard pass in football, you still get to play football and enjoy it. Even if you're the girl who couldn't serve a volleyball to save her life (what would you even serve a volleyball? what kind of food do they like?), you can still play and have fun! Because we won't publicly ridicule you! (We wait until you're gone.) Just kidding! Normally I talk about how good everyone was doing after PE. The only person who will really remember your mistakes is YOU. Nobody else will care about that botched serve after five minutes! Just remember to forgive and forget. Everybody stinks at something!