So today I am posting a list of things I will never do.
10 things I will NEVER do
- Compete in a decathlon. Or even know what all the events in a decathlon are, for that matter.
- Play major league baseball. The multi-million dollar salary would be nice, though.
- Go to college and major in English. Who cares if I can diagram every word in a sentence?
- Eat anything that is either on fire or still alive.
- Murder someone. Intentionally.
- Do drugs, smoke, or drink alcohol. I'm weird enough by myself without any help from those.
- Play the violin part of an orchestra piece on a cello just to show off. Not that I can play either of those instruments well enough to do that anyway.
- Run for President of the United States. We'll see about the Student Government.
- Write a globally acclaimed literary masterpiece. I'll be glad if I get an 'A' on my research paper.
- And I will never, EVER stop eating chocolate. Unless I suddenly develop an allergy.
Anyway, if you ever catch me doing any of those things, feel free to slap me upside the head. Just warn me before you do it.