Wednesday, August 26

University of Kanye

As many of you know, I started college on Monday, and as this is apparently a semi-big deal (?), I figured I would write a post for you all and let you know my thoughts.

Most people aren't familiar with the school I'm going to, though, so to make this post #relatable, I'm making up a pseudonym to make things more exciting. So here are my thoughts on college life after three days at the University of Kanye (enhanced with Kanye in various forms, naturally).


LET'S GET STARTED.

My thoughts on college life after three days:

1. Most teachers seem to relish seeing the terror struck into their students' hearts when the phrase
"Let's get to know each other a little better" leaves their mouths. When one of my teachers showed up with an entire PowerPoint presentation devoted to ice breaker questions for the morning, at first I was like


And then I have to admit I started looking for an escape route. (but it turned out to be super fun actually so yay)

One of my teachers actually gave us the assignment of writing a paper about ourselves - who we are and what we hope to accomplish in life - in an effort to "get to know us better".

And I mean honestly I think I got a little carried away maybe...


But nonetheless, I thought that was kind of a cool way to go about "getting to know each other" while managing to avoid awkward in class activities.

2. Why are there always annoying people everywhere no matter what? I'm generally a pretty nice person, but honey, if we just met and you've been oversharing with me for the last ten minutes while I respond almost exclusively with "Oh cool!" or "Wow!" and then I pull out my phone and you start flipping out because there are suction cups on the inside of my case and then you get all grabby with my phone case/wallet which has my phone and my cash and all my ID cards inside of it... DON'T BE SURPRISED IF THIS HAPPENS.


Assuming my unavoidable stereotypical social ineptitude as a former homeschooler, if I can tell that your behavior is socially unacceptable, you should be very ashamed of yourself. I would love to talk to you and be a friendly human being, but please don't get grabby with my important personal items.

3. In conjunction with my first day of college, I did my first mostly independent grocery shopping trip, and what I learned is that while it may make you feel like a responsible adult to buy vegetables, yogurt, and granola bars for your lunches, when it comes down to it, you have to actually eat the stuff you buy, and later in the week when you no longer have that "I just bought vegetables as an independent adult" high and all you want is junk food and all you have is cucumber slices? You will be unhappy. BUY GOLDFISH CRACKERS. (this is actually always good life advice)


YOLO.

So yeah. Three thoughts for three days of school because one thought a day is really just about as much as I can handle. Also, everyone should consider the University of Kanye because it's like, super fly. And to all of you guys, I hope your lives are absolutely awesome right now, and remember:


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