Tuesday, November 18

My Unintentional Experiment

I conducted an experiment over the last couple of days.

Okay, so it was kind of unintentional, but while I was showering this morning (all my greatest ideas come to me while I'm showering), I realized that it was also sort of an experiment, or at least the preliminary stages of an experiment.

We just discussed in one of my college classes that the first step to conducting an experiment is to make an observation. Here is my observation.

I was unusually productive Sunday, Monday, and this morning (Tuesday). I wrote a letter, I did homework, I practiced piano, I worked out, I cleaned my bathroom, I fixed my hair (quite an accomplishment), etc...

And the only thing that I've done any differently - other than actually accomplishing things - is not get on Facebook.

It was kind of an accident that I did this. While my general opinion of Facebook includes lots of adjectives like "shallow", "time-wasting", and "insipid", a summary of my usage of Facebook only requires one adjective: "addicted".

However, I was busy on Sunday and just kind of forgot to log on. And yesterday I was too busy getting stuff done, apparently.

I've been accidentally Facebook-free for over forty-eight hours. Now in the real world, that's not a whole lot of time. However, Facebook is not the real world, obviously, and in the Facebook world, forty-eight hours is a very, VERY long time.

This is clearly evidenced by the three emails that showed up in my inbox yesterday and this morning (in addition to over eight hundred college emails that have accumulated in about a month) from the lovely folks at Facebook telling me that I "have notifications pending."

(I hate email.)

Three emails in fifteen hours after one day of complete inactivity.

I'm normally fairly good at keeping up on my Facebook, but I can tell you right now that unless one of my fantastic friends stalked all my photos, the chances that I have more than three notifications are very low.

This leads me to the inevitable conclusion that this is an accurate description of Facebook's relationship with me:

Why is Facebook so desperate to get me re-hooked?

One can only conclude that Facebook is in cahoots with the Martians.

By brainwashing the entire population and forcing us into a sedentary lifestyle, the evil geniuses at the forefront of the social media empire are effectively gradually weakening the entire human race to the point that when the Martians invade, we will be all but powerless to defend ourselves.

I kid.

But seriously, I find it incredibly interesting and likely not coincidental that my real life activity increased relative to my decreased social media activity.

Facebook is great. In fact, I'm going to finally break my accidental social media fast so I can share this post (because otherwise like two people will read it, and while blogging is fun and all, it's much better when people actually read your writing).

But I would encourage you to try just taking a little time off and see what happens. It can't hurt. Your time is too valuable to spend on things that aren't beneficial.

Additionally, it's important to keep in mind when using Facebook that it isn't real. It creates an artificial environment, and it's easy to blur the lines between what is true and what isn't. Like anything else, there's nothing wrong with a little fun, but stay firmly grounded in reality. You have a life outside of Facebook.

I don't care how cute that guy is, he can wait a day to get a message from you (and if he can't then GIRL you don't need him). Those likes on your adorable new profile pic will still be there after some time has gone by. I know it seems absolutely crucial that everyone knows what an AMAAAZING time you had shopping with your BFF, but I promise the world will go on even if you don't update your status today.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a whole day ahead of me and time is a-wasting.

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