I Don't Volunteer

One of the latest developing fandoms is the Hunger Games fandom. And even though I wouldn't say I'm a member of the fandom, I did read the books and I've been watching the movies. And I am kind of a fan of the whole shebang. But not a member of the fandom. A fan, but not a fangirl. Get it?

But I was thinking last night while I was methodically raising and lowering heavy objects to develop muscular strength (because "lifting weights" sounds so terribly unladylike) and I arrived at a sobering conclusion.

I would die immediately if I was a Hunger Games tribute.

Here's why.

Reasons I wouldn't stand a chance in the Hunger Games

1. I lack a sense of self-preservation.

I honestly don't know what's wrong with me, but I just have this tendency to forget to look both ways when I cross the street, or to not think that the math building bathrooms at school are pretty terrifying. Example: the other day we were at the park and I was climbing on the playground (naturally) and Cam wanted me to come join him on one of the other platforms. Rather than climb down the stairs and up the ladder, I decided to work my way across the elevated labyrinth of doom, and only when I was nearly finished did I realize that 1) I don't have a good sense of balance, 2) I was about ten feet off the ground, and 3) I would have hurt myself pretty badly if I fell.

Genius.

2. I don't have any survival skills.

If you've watched either of the Hunger Games movies, you'll remember that the tributes train for some time before the actual games to develop their skills for surviving in the arena. 

But I have no skills whatsoever.

Camouflage - nope. Brute strength - definitely not. Stealth - LOL you're funny. Hunting - no. Traps - no. Super cool knowledge of electricity and all things technology so you can attach copper wire to a tree so that when it gets struck by lightning Katniss can shoot an arrow into the arena dome and basically break the Hunger Games (oops spoiler) - uhhh.

3. I would have no sponsors whatsoever.

I can't think on my feet or be adorable or anything like that when I'm under pressure. So when I was being interviewed by the weird smiley guy for all of Panem to watch LIVE...

I would just totally freeze up and not be charming or anything and nobody would be plugging for me. And then I would be sitting there in the arena trying to Instagram a picture of the nightlock I found ("Gonna make a berry smoothie!! LOL #happyhungergames") and then my phone would die and I would need a charger cable.

And I would have no one to float me a charger cable in one of those magical silver balloons. Because I was uncharming.

4. I have not a lot of pain tolerance.

I can remember probably six different times that Katniss was basically mortally wounded in the arena and just gritted her teeth and survived. Meanwhile, I kicked a dumbbell last night by accident and I cried for ten minutes while cradling my poor toes.

My dad has a bunch of cactus plants in our backyard (because what could possibly go wrong?) and one time I got one of the spikes stuck in my foot. We spent probably thirty minutes sitting in the kitchen with me crying and screaming like I was being murdered (because I sure thought I was) and Dad getting gradually more and more frustrated until he finally ripped the thing out of my foot. And it didn't even hurt that much. I just don't like pain.

5. I can't climb a tree or jump over logs or swim or do anything in a non-clumsy way.

Rather than try to explain this one to you, I'll just show you a few images that should help you understand the extent of my clumsiness and why this would contribute to my ultimate demise.

My first comment when the movie showed the opening of the games where the tributes are all surveying the arena while standing on their little pedestal things that blow up if you move off of them before the official start was, "I would fall off and get blown up before I even had a chance to be brutally murdered..."

6. I'm too polite.

It's a little difficult to kill people when you wouldn't even call them a bad name or cut in front of them in line.

And so yeah. That's why the Hunger Games is not the game for me.

So as far is this is concerned...

Yeah, no. No thanks. I do NOT volunteer as tribute.

Peer Review

So I've taken quite a few writing classes, whether at home or through homeschool co-ops or in my dual enrollment classes. They've all been very different in many ways, but one thing that has been the same in every last one, the thing that all English teachers seem to love and all students love to hate, the thing that never fails to drive me absolutely bonkers - peer review.

I simply don't understand how anybody can write anything so bad as all the papers I have to evaluate. So in an attempt to better relate to ninety percent of the people in my composition classes, I've decided to try to write something like the hoi polloi... *AHEM* Meredith's poor writing!

Poor Writing About Writing

Writing is one thing that almost all students I know have to do alot of. Though, not many people are very good writing. And, I think I must be good at it because well, I just do it alot. Though, there are something about it that are just distasteful. One thing that people dislike with writing is, that it takes alot of time. And, alot of people are really criticism of other's writing especially when they think their are mistakes. I had one teacher who always told me I used to many commas and then gave us alot of rules about them, but, I think that I use them right all ways. He said that their where only too people in the class who knew how to use them, commas, rightly, but, I was thinking he got confused and is wrong. He also told the class that he can tell when they dont know how to use commas because, they just put them in every, six, words, or so. I know I don't do that, so,,,, I think I'm ok. 

To conclude although people battle, ferociously, against  writing. Though I think, its ok, and continue to do it alot.

I hope my thoughts weren't organized too clearly... I don't think I did a very good job being bad. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a writing assignment to do.

True Confessions

I turned sixteen about a month ago, so by my own standards, I'm now officially old. When I was turning ten I thought I would never make it to sixteen. I couldn't wait to be older and have more independence and get to do all kinds of fun things. But now that I am older, and I know what it's actually like, all I want is to be a toddler again.
So sometimes I like to channel my inner screaming spoiled brat.

My name is Meredith, and I am a sixteen-year-old toddler. These are my true confessions.

1. Sometimes I just sit on the couch crying over literary analyses and chemical equations that need to be balanced and life that needs to be figured out, and then I just holler across the house at the top of my lungs and demand leftover pizza and apple juice.

2. I sleep with a blankie, and have difficulty sleeping without my blankie.
Not to mention that I actually still have a blankie, not to mention that I still call it my blankie...

3. I am not above lying in the middle of the floor if I happen to be tired.

4. I'm scared of ordering for myself in restaurants, buying my own things in stores, and going in fitting rooms that have guards - I mean employees - outside.

5. I don't like brushing my hair.

6. I am a HUGE fan of Max and Ruby.

7. Goldfish crackers are my one weakness.

8. Dog = PUPPY!!!!!! Cat = KITTY!!!!!!

9. I really like crayons and markers.

10. I'm scared to cross the street by myself.

11. I still kind of get excited that I can use the big forks now.

And don't even get me started on the Toddlers and Tiaras girls. They are all my spirit animals.

Every. Day.

Out of the mouths of babes...

YESYESYESYESYES

Preach it, girlie.

Now I have to go study... *pouty face* I DON'T WANNA!!!!!!

Melancholy

I like melancholy things. 

Did someone say melon collie?

Yeah, no. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking black and white photos, staring longingly off into the distance, silhouettes, and poetry. I'm talking "a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause." 

Meredith being melancholy doesn't really mean Meredith is sad. Because I really like the pensive part of melancholy. And the "no obvious cause" part is pretty nice too. Because being sad with an obvious cause is really not fun.

People who are unfortunate enough to be familiar with me know that generally I'm a pretty happy person. I've chilled out a lot over the last year or so, but I'm definitely not a big fan of being bummed out. But sometimes I just like to sit in my room, play music, and be melancholy. Melancholy is a dependable sort of emotion. Happiness can be fleeting, obnoxious, and tiring. Anger is exhausting and unpleasant for all parties affected by it. 

But melancholy just stays with you, a sort of bittersweet comfort. It's nice to be melancholy sometimes because you get to just sit quietly and think about things. It's sort of like that feeling right before you hug someone.

I like to listen to music when I'm melancholy, like this...

Also frequently appearing on my "Melon Collie" playlist are Christina Perri ("Jar of Hearts" will always do it for me), Passenger ("Let Her Go"), Ed Sheeran ("This"), or my personal favorite (although it only works for me if I play it myself) - Chopin.

Or sometimes I just peruse photos, quotes, or poetry that bring out my melancholy tendencies.
Here are a few.

And after just a few minutes of pondering all the big things in my life like college and jobs and careers, I forget about little-big things like economics projects and algebra tests. And somehow, the bigger things seem easier to think about than those little things, because they're in the future, and at least while I'm being melancholy, I don't have to face any of my troubles.
There's a sort of refuge in sadness, you see. Sadly, I don't think that prose is entirely appropriate to really describe something so melancholy as melancholy (especially my prose). Consequently, I must turn you loose to learn about it for yourselves from the poetic masters.
Here's a tiny gem to get you started.

"And so, being young and dipt in folly

I fell in love with melancholy."

-Edgar Allen Poe

Frozen

Okay, I'm as sick of Frozen stuff as the next person (I mean, just LET IT GO people!) 

BUT

Please watch this anyway. It made my life a little better.